Sign-In
Cart
I Can't Stop Saying Sorry: Breaking the Fawning Response When People-Pleasing Became Survival
Paperback
Publisher: Independently Published
Published: Nov 3 2025
Pages: 60
Weight: 0.21
Height: 0.12 Width: 6.00 Depth: 9.00
Language: English
You say sorry when someone bumps into you. You apologize for asking questions, for taking up space, or for having needs. You make yourself smaller, quieter, and agree to things you don't want to do, all while wondering why you can't just say no.
You haven't been weak; you've been surviving.
This book is a guide to understanding the fawning response-the fourth trauma response that is so often mistaken for kindness. It's the response that emerges when you can't fight or flee, so you learn to please to stay safe.
Instead of offering simplistic advice like just be more assertive, this book validates your experience. It will help you understand:
Why apologizing became your default shield.
The hypervigilance of reading every room.
Why setting boundaries feels terrifyingly dangerous.
How to stop abandoning your own needs before anyone even asks.
You're not broken. You're not a doormat. You are someone whose nervous system did exactly what it needed to do to keep you alive. This book gives you permission to finally stop, to rest, and to learn that your needs matter, too.
Also from
Lamarre, Dorian
The Trauma Living in My Gut: How Your Microbiome Holds Trauma and Why Healing Your Gut Heals Your Mind
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
Understanding the "Favorite Person" Dynamic: Why One Person Feels Like Everything When You Have BPD
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
I Inherited My Anxiety: Understanding Intergenerational Trauma, Epigenetics, and Breaking Family Patterns
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
I'm Afraid I'm a Narcissist: Why You're Terrified You're Secretly a Bad Person
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
Why Do I Feel Worse After Therapy?: When Healing Makes Everything Hurt More
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
I'm Afraid of Being Seen as an Abuser: When the Fear of Causing Harm Makes You Freeze
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
By Rejecting Myself, I Am Keeping Others Safe: Why You Believe Your Self-Worth Is Dangerous
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
If I Don't Let People Feel Superior to Me, They Won't Love Me: Why You Make Yourself Small in Every Relationship
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
Victimizer or Victim: There Are Only Two Roles in My Mind, and I Don't Want to Be Either
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
Why You Can't Study Even Though You're Smart: When Learning Feels Dangerous
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
I Feel Like a Little Kid Inside: Healing Your Inner Child and Learning to Reparent Yourself
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
Everyone Has Something I Don't: When You Feel Fundamentally Behind and Missing a Piece Others Were Given
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
I Can't Stop Checking If My Partner Still Loves Me: Why You Need Constant Reassurance
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
I Know What I Need to Do (So Why Can't I Do It?): Breaking Free When Understanding Your Problems Doesn't Fix Them
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
I Can't Stop Feeling Sorry: Breaking Free from Chronic Guilt When Being 'Good' Was Never Enough
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
The Vital Few: Reclaiming Your Energy from the Noise of Everything Else to Focus on What Truly Matters
Lamarre, Dorian
Paperback
Also in
Mental Health
The ADHD Workbook for Kids: Helping Children Gain Self-Confidence, Social Skills, & Self-Control
Shapiro, Lawrence E.
Paperback
The Chemistry of Joy Workbook: Overcoming Depression Using the Best of Brain Science, Nutrition, and the Psychology of Mindfulness
Emmons, Henry
Paperback
Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence--From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror
Herman, Judith Lewis
Paperback
The Mindful Way Through Depression: Freeing Yourself from Chronic Unhappiness [With CD]
Teasdale, John
Segal, Zindel
Williams, Mark
Paperback
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma
Van Der Kolk, Bessel
Paperback
Unfuck Your Brain: Using Science to Get Over Anxiety, Depression, Anger, Freak-Outs, and Triggers
Harper, Faith G.
Paperback
The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness
Haidt, Jonathan
Hardcover
The Courage to Be Disliked: The Japanese Phenomenon That Shows You How to Change Your Life and Achieve Real Happiness
Kishimi, Ichiro
Koga, Fumitake
Paperback
Unlearn Your Pain: The Science of Recovering from Chronic Pain, Fatigue, Anxiety, and Depression
Schubiner, Howard, MD
Hardcover
A Guide to Open Water Lifesaving: Lessons on Love, Care, and Survival: A Memoir
Eubanks, Virginia
Hardcover
The Life-Changing Art of Self-Brain Surgery: Connecting Neuroscience and Faith to Radically Transform Your Life
Warren MD W. Lee
Hardcover
Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself (Revised and Updated)
Beattie, Melody
Paperback
How to Deal with Your ____ So Your Kids Don't Have to: An Encyclopedia for Ditching Your Emotional Baggage
Harwood, Eli, M. a. Lpc
Hardcover
Breaking Free of Child Anxiety and OCD: A Scientifically Proven Program for Parents
Lebowitz, Eli R.
Paperback
The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook: Practical Dbt Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotion Regulation, a
Wood, Jeffrey C.
Brantley, Jeffrey
McKay, Matthew
Paperback
Your Ocd Will Hate This Book: A Proven System to Overcome Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder and Take Back Your Life
Peterson, Nathan
Hardcover
Why We Fight: A Transformative Road Map to Healing Conflict in Any Relationship
Polinder, Kim
Hardcover
It's Ok That You're Not Ok: Meeting Grief and Loss in a Culture That Doesn't Understand
Devine, Megan
Paperback
The Complex PTSD Workbook: A Mind-Body Approach to Regaining Emotional Control and Becoming Whole
Schwartz, Arielle, PhD
Paperback
Why Does Everybody Hate Me?: Living and Loving with Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria
Partridge, Alex
Paperback
Taking Charge of Adult ADHD: Proven Strategies to Succeed at Work, at Home, and in Relationships
Barkley, Russell A.
Paperback
My Grandmother's Hands: Racialized Trauma and the Pathway to Mending Our Hearts and Bodies
Menakem, Resmaa
Paperback
It Didn't Start with You: How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle
Wolynn, Mark
Paperback
The Biology of Trauma: How the Body Holds Fear, Pain, and Overwhelm, and How to Heal It
Apigian, Aimie
Hardcover
El Cuerpo Lleva La Cuenta: Cerebro, Mente Y Cuerpo En La Superación del Trauma / The Body Keeps the Score
Van Der Kolk, Bessel
Paperback
How Will I Ever Get Through This?: Evidence-Based Tools to Help You Heal from Hardship, Grief, and Loss
Hone, Lucy
Paperback
The Digital Delusion: How Classroom Technology Harms Our Kids' Learning--And How to Help Them Thrive Again; Updated Edition
Cooney Horvath, Jared, PhD Med
Paperback
When the Ache Remains: Lessons on Tending to the Unfixable and Finding Beauty Anyway
Olivera, Lisa
Hardcover
The Internal Family Systems Workbook: A Guide to Discover Your Self and Heal Your Parts
Schwartz, Richard C.
Paperback
The Success Trap: How the Pressure to Stand Out Is Fueling Anxiety, Depression, and Burnout in Teens--And the Fundamental Fix They Deserve
Slavin, Stuart, MD Med
Hardcover
Self-Care for People with ADHD: 100+ Ways to Recharge, De-Stress, and Prioritize You!
Hamdani, Sasha
Hardcover
Parenting Anxiety: Breaking the Cycle of Worry and Raising Resilient Kids
Elkins, Meredith, PhD
Elkins, Meredith, PhD
Hardcover
Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence---From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror
Herman, Judith Lewis
Paperback
Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief Workbook: Tools for Releasing Pain and Remembering with Love
Kessler, David
Paperback
What Happened to You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing
Winfrey, Oprah
Perry, Bruce D., M. D. PH. D.
Hardcover
Once I Get Started: The Adult ADHD Program for Turning Your Intentions Into Actions
Ramsay, Russell, PH. D.
Hardcover
The Simple Guide to ADHD Regulation: The Secret to Finding Balance, Getting Things Done, and Enjoying Your Life
Free CCC, Jenna
Hardcover
The Neurodivergence Skills Workbook for Autism and ADHD: Cultivate Self-Compassion, Live Authentically, and Be Your Own Advocate
Kemp, Jennifer
Mitchelson, Monique
Paperback
Overcoming the Wall of Awful: Why It's Hard to Get Things Done with Adhd, Autism, and Anxiety (and How to Do Them Anyway)
Mahan Med MS, Brendan
Capell, Alex Hughes
Hardcover
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma
Van Der Kolk, Bessel
Hardcover
Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma: The Innate Capacity to Transform Overwhelming Experiences
Levine, Peter A.
Paperback
Therapy Nation: How America Got Hooked on Therapy and Why It's Left Us More Anxious and Divided
Alpert, Jonathan
Hardcover
Good Moms Have Scary Thoughts: A Healing Guide to the Secret Fears of New Mothers
Kleiman, Karen
Hardcover
Where Do You Feel That in Your Body?: Moving Beyond Talk Therapy to Understand the Language of the Nervous System
Saunders, Simone
Hardcover
Mind Over Mood: Change How You Feel by Changing the Way You Think
Greenberger, Dennis
Padesky, Christine A.
Paperback
One in Five: Why Child Sexual Abuse Is Our Biggest Public Health Crisis--And What We Can Do to Stop It
Letourneau, Elizabeth J.
Malone, Luke
Hardcover
How to ADHD: An Insider's Guide to Working with Your Brain (Not Against It)
McCabe, Jessica
Hardcover
The Courage to Be Disliked: The Japanese Phenomenon That Shows You How to Change Your Life and Achieve Real Happiness
Kishimi, Ichiro
Koga, Fumitake
Hardcover
I Hate You--Don't Leave Me: Third Edition: Understanding the Borderline Personality
Straus, Hal
Kreisman, Jerold J.
Paperback
Self-Care for Autistic People: 100+ Ways to Recharge, De-Stress, and Unmask!
Neff, Megan Anna
Hardcover
Rewire Your Anxious Brain: How to Use the Neuroscience of Fear to Overcome Anxiety, Panic, and Worry
Pittman, Catherine M.
Karle, Elizabeth M.
Paperback
Your Anxiety Is Giving Me Anxiety: A Survival Guide for Thriving in a High-Stress World
April, Elizabeth
Paperback
Together: The Healing Power of Human Connection in a Sometimes Lonely World
Murthy, Vivek H.
Paperback
Why We Suffer and How We Heal: Using Narrative, Ritual, and Purpose to Flourish Through Life's Challenges
Song, Suzan, MD PhD
Hardcover
MANUAL SUPERANDO PÉRDIDAS EMOCIONALES, vigésimo aniversario, edición extendida: programa de acción para superar la muerte, el divorcio y otras pérdida
James, John W.
Friedman, Russell
Paperback
Embracing Our Fragmented Selves: A Workbook for Trauma Survivors and Therapists
Fisher, Janina
Paperback
Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care about Has Borderline Personality Disorder
Kreger, Randi
Mason, Paul T. T.
Paperback
Even the Darkest Night: A Father's Journey of Hope and Healing from Paternal Depression
Choukalas, Christopher G., MD
Hardcover
The Unfragile Mind: A Physician's Call for Restoring Hope and Humanity to Mental Health Care
Francis, Gavin
Hardcover
Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
Hayes, Steven C.
Paperback
Unfuck Your Brain Workbook: Using Science to Get Over Anxiety, Depression, Anger, Freak-Outs, and Triggers
Harper, Faith G.
Paperback
Mind Drama: The Science of Rumination and How to Outwit Your Inner Defeatist
Nakazawa, Donna Jackson
Hardcover
The ADHD Effect on Marriage: Understand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps
Orlov, Melissa
Paperback
The Road Less Traveled, Timeless Edition: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values and Spiritual Growth
Peck, M. Scott
Paperback
Nervous Systems: Spiritual Practices to Calm Anxiety in Your Body, the Church, and Politics
Billups, Sara
Paperback
Ungrateful Immigrant Daughter: A Memoir from the Child of a Mail-Order Bride
Suvorova, Katya
Paperback
Mind Your Body: A Revolutionary Program to Release Chronic Pain and Anxiety
Sachs, Nicole J., Lcsw
Hardcover
Thriving with ADHD Workbook for Kids: 60 Fun Activities to Help Children Self-Regulate, Focus, and Succeed
Miller, Kelli, Lcsw MSW
Paperback
Holy Hurt: Understanding Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing
McBride, Hillary L., PhD
McBride, Hillary L., PhD
Paperback
Practicing Mindfulness: 75 Essential Meditations to Reduce Stress, Improve Mental Health, and Find Peace in the Everyday
Sockolov, Matthew
Paperback
A Radical Guide for Women with ADHD: Embrace Neurodiversity, Live Boldly, and Break Through Barriers
Solden, Sari
Frank, Michelle
Paperback
The Joy of Solitude: How to Reconnect with Yourself in an Overconnected World
Coplan, Robert J.
Hardcover
Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts: A Cbt-Based Guide to Getting Over Frightening, Obsessive, or Disturbing Thoughts
Seif, Martin N.
Winston, Sally M.
Paperback
Living Well with Adult ADHD: Practical Strategies for Improving Your Daily Life
Knouse, Laura E.
Barkley, Russell A.
Paperback
Your Brain's Not Broken: Strategies for Navigating Your Emotions and Life with ADHD
Rosier Tamara Phd
Paperback
Freedom from Panic: Evidence-Based Techniques to End Avoidance and Stop Panic Before It Stops You
Zucker, Bonnie
Paperback
Retrain Your Brain: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy in 7 Weeks: A Workbook for Managing Depression and Anxiety
Gillihan, Seth J., PhD
Paperback
I Want to Die But I Still Want to Eat Tteokbokki: Further Conversations with My Psychiatrist
Sehee, Baek
Paperback
I Don't Want to Talk about It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression
Real, Terrence
Paperback
Enciende Tu Cerebro: La Clave Para La Felicidad, La Manera de Pensar Y La Salud
Leaf, Dra Caroline
Paperback
Strength beyond the Shadows: Overcoming a Childhood of Trauma, Neglect, and Sexual Abuse
Gehle, Seth
Paperback
Artistry of the Mentally Ill: A Contribution to the Psychology and Psychopathology of Configuration
Prinzhorn, Hans
Paperback
Anxiety Relief for Kids: On-The-Spot Strategies to Help Your Child Overcome Worry, Panic, and Avoidance
Walker, Bridget Flynn
Paperback
Psychedelic Medicine & Internal Family Systems (Ifs) Therapy: A Clinical Skills Manual
Schwartz, Richard C.
Sweezy, Martha
Lovas, David
Paperback
How I Know White People Are Crazy and Other Stories: Notes from a Frustrated Black Psychologist
Lassiter, Jonathan
Hardcover
The Wisdom of Your Body: Finding Healing, Wholeness, and Connection Through Embodied Living
McBride, Hillary L., PhD
Paperback
The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook: An Integrative Program to Understand and Manage Your Bpd
Fox, Daniel J.
Paperback
Reclaiming Your Life from Medical Trauma: Recognize the Symptoms, Find Treatment That Works, and Heal Your Brain and Body
Jackson, James C.
Hardcover
How to Thrive at College: A Guide to the Ups and Downs of Mental Health on Campus
Ross, Mathilde
Paperback
Unoffendable: How Just One Change Can Make All of Life Better (Updated with Two New Chapters)
Hansen, Brant
Paperback
Unwinding Anxiety: New Science Shows How to Break the Cycles of Worry and Fear to Heal Your Mind
Brewer, Judson
Paperback
Radiance in Pain and Resilience: The global reverberation of Palestinian historical trauma
Maté, Gabor
Berger, Elizabeth
Jabr, Samah
Paperback
How to Make Your Brain Your Best Friend: A Neuroscientist's Guide to a Healthier, Happier Life
Barr, Rachel
Hardcover
Healing Autistic Burnout: A Neuroaffirming Guide for Connecting with Your Authentic Self, Restoring Your Energy, and Advocating for Your Needs
O'Connor, Sharon Kaye
Paperback
F*ck Anxiety: 101 Ways to Soothe Anxiety, Stop the Panic + Get Back to Your Badass Self
Douglas, Lauren
Paperback
El Tdah Es Genial: Una Guía Práctica Y Divertida Para Adultos Que Desean Avanzar En Su Vida / ADHD Is Awesome: A Guide to (Mostly) Thriving with ADHD
Holderness, Penn
Holderness, Kim
Paperback
The Awakened Brain: The New Science of Spirituality and Our Quest for an Inspired Life
Miller, Lisa
Hardcover
The Lies We Tell Ourselves: How to Face the Truth, Accept Yourself, and Create a Better Life
Frederickson, Jon
Paperback
Girlhood, Translated: Understanding Young Women in the Age of Therapy Speak and Self-Diagnosis
Garfinkle-Crowell, Suzanne, M. D.
Hardcover
Pure O Ocd: Letting Go of Obsessive Thoughts with Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
Lejeune, Chad
Paperback